Reflective practice, goal setting and journaling
In recent years I have started journaling and self-reflection practices that have really helped me to get myself in order. After chatting to a few people I’ve decided to share how I journal, set goals and do self-reflection activities to support others that want to start self-reflection, gratitude work or journaling.
My reflective practices include daily reflections, quarterly goal-setting and quarterly and monthly check-ins. I use regular blank notebooks and then just write in the headings. No need for any fancy or pre-laid out notebooks or journals! This means you can adapt it to your personal requirements.
Be as creative as you want for any of your reflective practices - you can have simple lists or you can draw boxes and charts and use colours - whatever works for you!
DAILY REFLECTIONS
This practice has enabled me to follow a regular routine and to take time to reflect on the day.
Daily checklist
Down the side of the page I have a list of actions/tasks I want to do every day, or a specific number of days e.g. drink lemon water, yoga, meditation, read, workout, learn. There are also some things that I tally e.g. number of coffees, hours of sleep. It totally there’s about 12 things on the list but yours can be as long or as short as you like!
Along the top, I initial the days: M, Tu, W, Th, F, Sa, Su.
Each evening I tick or tally down the list (note, not everything I aim to do daily - it’s important not to set unrealistic expectations of yourself).
Reflections
The next page I split into three headings but you could do a page a heading (and adapt the heading for your own needs).
Gratitude: I note one thing I’m grateful for that day - big or small.
Moments: one or two things that made me smile or stick out in my mind - could be seeing beautiful clouds to hearing a great song to someone being kind on public transport.
TBF (Thoughts, Behaviour, Feelings): a process I learnt through CBT - appreciating that these are all linked and trying to unpick why. Note down any of these and their links to the others e.g. thinking I’m not doing well at work leading me to compulsively eat and then feeling crap.
Most days I write one or two sentences under each heading. Sometimes I miss a day or don’t have anything to write. That’s ok.
Doing the checklist and reflections alongside each other enables me to see links e.g. drinking or not getting enough sleep can impact the TBF.
You can also leave space/pages for general reflections/notes.
MONTHLY AND QUARTERLY REFLECTIONS
This practice came from feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt, telling myself I wasn’t going anywhere in my life and hadn’t achieved anything. In fact, I had - I just wasn’t taking time to reflect on anything!
Monthly
At the end of every month I take some time out with a cup of tea (at a local cafe when not in lockdown!) and note the following:
Monthly reflection: free writing on what’s happened in the month, how I feel, where I’m at. Usually about one A5 page.
Achievements & opportunities: note down anything big or small that I’ve achieved - could be delivering a piece of work or completing a game or trying a new recipe!
Next month to-do list: 2-5 bullet points of bigger tasks I want to achieve e.g. read a certain book, go for a walk, get in touch with someone. These can contribute to larger goals or just be reminders of things to do. Then I’ll usually put them in my online diary as reminders so they’re done!
Quarterly
Done at the end of every three months I look back and make notes on the following areas:
Work and community (incl. volunteering)
Relationships (incl. friends + family)
Health + wellbeing
Travel
Fun + leisure
Learning + development
For most, it’s just bullet points of things I’ve done but others are more reflective on where I’m at.
Then I reflect on any quarterly goals I might have set at the previous review and then set new goals for the quarter ahead. My experience is that a maximum of three larger goals is enough - don’t try to do too much at once! And these can be for within that time frame or which you will work towards in that time but might not be complete in that quarter.
At the start and end of the year I also set goals and do reflection. 2020 was the first year where I sat and wrote out proper annual goals, which given how the year has gone could have been frustrating but actually at the halfway point I took stock and reviewed some of the goals/plans (moving abroad, for example) and explored how I could work on other, relevant steps to get there.
I know I won’t have achieved everything I set out to but that’s ok - things change - not just the unexpected but you might also change your mind on some things. This is a practice of self-reflection, goal setting and journaling that works for me and hopefully, with a bit of exploration, you can find one that works for you.